Being assertive and dealing with confrontation:
Part of being assertive is to know properly how to deal with confrontation, It is not always easy:
Here are seven tips to deal with confrontation:
When you know you are going to have a confrontation, take a deep breath just before the confrontation or during it if necessary. This lowers your heartbeat and blood pressure, because we all have that fast heartbeat even if we just reherse the possible event.
Breathe a little slower, again this lowers your heartbeat and lowers the amount of adrenaline running through your body.
Take 5 minutes, if you can, and quickly rehearse what you are going to say to someone. Make key points of your argument, you can even write it down.
Get to know what triggers your anger and prepare a new response to that trigger. By doing this you are aware of the buttons people can push to elicit a certain response. When you know your own triggers it less likely that someone can push the buttons as you are prepared.
Think that the other person will be as nervouse as you.
Keep your cool.
Make the person aware of how confrontational they are being. Saying something like ‘why are you shouting at me?’, ‘Why are you being so aggressive’. This turns the energy back on the person and lets them look at themselves for a minute, this might calm them down as a lot of people get lost in the moment and don’t realize they are being aggressive.
Another way is to turn all the attention back on the person you are arguing with. ‘You seem really angry about that!’; ‘You look as if you’re really pissed off?’ ...keep breathing.
Don’t get sucked into their arguments. The purpose of an argument is to manipulate you into losing the argument thereby showing the other person they have won and they are superior. If you don’t get sucked
in there is no argument to win, and you come out looking the better person. (Is not like you need to show that anyway, ...you know it)
.
If all else fails, the nose is a good place to hit first which can temporarily blind them with tears.
